Unorganised tidbits

I have had few things on my mind for a while, but apparently I am still too exhausted to ponder or maybe I just want to be an airhead for a while.
And to be honest, what I would say I have said a thousand times, what I want is also what I don't want. Something needs to find its place, but I don't know what it is and where its place is.

Maybe I am just getting too much human contact during the days and it strains me... It would be understandable, it has been years since I was continuosly in contact with big group of people on daily basis.

Stitchy front

I have a bad case of modelstitchingitis and startitis at the same time, which is not good noticing that I have one RR to stitch and send out at 15th. Though, at least I have been stitching models, which hasn't happened in few days because I have got to bed quite early.
Last September I suffered from insomnia, now it's more like hypersomnia - that means that I do not have time to stitch as when I am at home I am most likely catching up emails/ forums, cooking dinner or sleeping...

The reason?

See the second paragraph of this entry, or that is what I think it is...

Which is actually quite odd as I really crave human contact, but the contact I need is so different from what I get on daily basis.
I don't need crowds around me as I can't take the strain. I would be completely contended with one person who gets me and loves me as I am.

Which makes it even odder is that I don't actually don't crave for a relationship, but I admittedly could use all its advantages. Therefore I apparently have to say what I have said quite few times: I need another FWB. (It's as difficult to find a good FWB as it is to find a good lover...)
Or something... Actually all I need is more time, less confrontations, find out is this asthma or what and have someone who shelters me when I am tired.

...Confrontations... that may also explain quite a bit as even though the group in the course is rather good there are moments when I get anxious of the fact that people don't want to see any other point of view than their own or think outside of their minimalistic box. Or that if they wish to do so they should let the rest choose do they want to share the same box, have their own or be box-free.
When you have free spirit and lousy defenses you suffer greatly in such situations.

Maybe I should stop this now, stitch a bit and bury myself under the cats after it... (By the way, have I mentioned that I simply love my futon?)