Those Little Things

... that make you grateful: wrapping your child's presents in the middle of the night.

Those little things that were once so unlikely.

Power of those funny little presumptions

It's funny really...

I was out in the town with Boy some time ago when I happened to stumble upon ex-husband.
Who didn't recognize me before I greeted him and even then he knew it was me because of the necklace I use. (It's not that common to use necklace with Hebrew word in it in my neck of the woods.)

And he didn't realize the most obvious thing: that I was pushing a pram, a big "combo" pram (Attack carts we call 'em here) as he asked what I am doing nowadays... I had to point out that this is what I am doing nowadays, pushing a pram and living life with a certain charming little man. It was like he hadn't even noticed that big black thing in front of me. As it is a baby thing and not something I could ever push around.

What makes it funny, or rather interesting, was that his brain had obviously categorized me as "barren" after those years we TTC. Even he knew that basically the problem wasn't THAT big... (and then few years later, thyroxine came along and changed the whole thing).

It's funny how I used to think that he's not stuck into categories or anything like that... even after I came to my senses back in 2004.

Though what makes me wonder is that didn't he really recognize the face he was married with for almost six years (and I still look almost the same, by the way) or did that pram really mes his little head THAT badly.
Life's little questions...

Breastfeeding: epilogue

Well, at the ripe age of three and a half months our little guy decided that it's time to do something about his breast milk addiction, went cold turkey and since then little guy has been a formula baby.
Shame really, I did enjoy looking at that little guy's happy face when he was feeding.

But, he won't starve as he understands how many fun foods there are out there and eats solids like a big boy already. Oatmeal is a big hit even he has only started it yesterday.
I guess he'll survive without my milk.

Funny thing is that apparently it runs in my family that babies tend to stop breastfeeding around three-or-so months even if there were milk present.
Though in my family babies also tend to get the idea of solids really fast and require solids almost from birth. We have hungry genes.

RANT: Breastfeeding

How time flies, young one is soon 3 months old!

If you don't want to read (rant) about breastfeeding, stop now.

Good and bad results

Because I am overweight, have PCOs diagnose, have genetic tendency and I am over 25 I had sugar stress test last week to check if I have developed gestational diabetes. (Actually I have had two of them, first in first trimester, because of my weight.)
I was certain that I would because my fast levels were barely in healthy level in the first test, but was proven wrong today: to my great surprise my sugar balance has basically improved since first trimester despite having sleep problems last two weeks! 

Though this means I won't get size evaluation at 36 weeks and that birth won't be induced unless we go two weeks over due date... but on the other hand: no blood sugar tests several times a day, less restricted diet, smaller probability for a big baby (well, I was 3,6 kgs back in 1979 ) and smaller risk to develop DM II at later age.

But I also got explanation to my sleep disorder and other issues: my thyroid levels are seriously out of whack, again.   And I missed my endo's call today which means he's out of touch for a while, or so I understood when I talked with the receptionist, and decided to be a BAD patient: I just adjust my dose with same done my endo has used lately and get new test done next month.
He'll kill me, but so what?

Things, they are a-changing... SECRETS!

The reason for my absence from online world is small, but still great.

The reason has made my thyroid values to drop, drop, drop, regardless that I take higher doses than ever before.

But it is all worth it. Thousand times worth it.

Only few people can see this post. You are the ones who I trust to keep your mouths shut everywhere else as this is still a secret in FB or in the forums I frequent(ed). And probably will remain one few months.

I was checking my cycle data at Fertilityfriend earlier this evening because I wanted to know did I had any recorded ovulations before I got thyroxine.

I had, one, in the beginning of April 2009.

Wth my newly acquired knowledge about temperature change patterns in menstrual cycle I found something from that chart, something that surprised me.
There was a triphasic pattern in it. Which can indicate pregnancy (I know it always doesn't).

Otherwise I would have just thought that I just had that kind of a pattern, but I remember that cycle well as I felt after the ovulation that there is something different in this cycle, and had increasing feeling of maybe even being pregnant. I just didn't buy the test because I knew they wouldn't say anything about it after just few days. I decided to wait until few days after my menses should begin.

Only couple of days before menstruation I fell quite badly (slipped) and the day after that I spotted. For one day. That same day my temperature dropped drastically. And shortly after that my menses started.

What ifs and maybes, yes, but it's odd and not all pleasant feeling. If it was so the good thing is that I can actually get pregnant (though based on that it's other thing to stay pregnant), but it also means that I miscarried. And I can't help to think that if I was pregnant and if everything had went differently our baby would be eight months by now.

And that hurts like hell.

And I am probably slightly crazy... but still, even the what if is good enough for me. And even the slight possibility can make me sad.

Blaah: ankle, thyroxine, D3 and yadda yadda.

Well, my ankle was completely ok for a month after starting thyroxine...

Then it wasn't and on Monday I had to see a doctor about it...

The result was: inflamed tendon (which is, based on the doc, quite common issue even months after ankle injury), ton of pain killers and week off - in forced rest.

So - *not* - cool (even though I have now had the advantage of being able to lay next to a fan 24/7 as it has been over +30°C for last week or so (coming to think of it the heatwave started when Mr. Wonderful traveled to Lagos)), as I am dead sure that my thyroid dislikes naproxen even it should not affect to thyroid function in any way (like I would believe that?!) as I don't feel very good.
Well, I upped my thyroxin dose two days ago and quit The N today. Let's see what my thyroid says about it.

 

On other news I decided to try "unhealthy" dose (at this moment 100µg/ day) of D3 (recommendation in here is 5-10µg/ day, which is way too low in a country with short summer, everyone knows it) as I have been told that it might actually boost thyroid function, but what really made me try it was this: Vitamin D Can Aid Fertility.

"A study has found a link between low levels of Vitamin D and problems with ovulation.- - - The team from Yale University School of Medicine studied 67 infertile women and took Vitamin D measures from them. Only 7 per cent of them had normal vitamin D levels and the rest had either insufficient levels or clinical deficiency.- - -

Dr Lubna Pal, from Yale, said: "Of note, not a single patient with either ovulatory disturbance or polycystic ovary syndrome demonstrated normal Vitamin D levels"
(Editorial note: Bolding by yours truly)

Now that's something.

Of course the thyroxine will also help with ovulation as it raises my desperately low basal temperature to normal levels and balances hormonal function: at the moment my basal temperature is about 0,5°C higher than it was pre-thyroxine - and I have only used it 6½ weeks.

I am a body yes...

You Are a Pond

You are modest, pleasant, and reliable. You are content and confident. You are harmonious and caring. You truly like other people for who they are. You are a very genuine, humble person. Because of this, you're very approachable. You are soft-spoken and a bit sensitive. Your mild personality is a refreshing change for people. What Body of Water Are You?