Happy...

...divorceversary snowprincipessa!

1780

You know how it goes... there is a finishing method you have wanted to try for a while and then someone decides to organize an exchange for that spesific finish...
This means that I have now stitched one humbug on light fabric (I love how it came out) and am still to stitch another one, with the same design and same floss, on dark fabric.
And of course, being me, I have designed the design I use (actually I have also dyed one of the fabrics I use), and, just to make it fun, I have designed additional pieces while stitching the first one and it is becoming a series...

I see the series stitched with certain Crescent Colours' silk on flax Newcastle - just when I had swore to myself to stay away from flax linen for a while.
It's good to have my creativity back, but I'd rather transfer some of the energy to be used in the tasks of life, at least for a while as I am seriously lacking mental energy...

Though, I have surprised myself by doing some serious spring cleaning (it doesn't look like it yet as I have also reorganized my living room, again) and not suffering from it too badly - I still can't stand long time physical activities without straining myself somewhat, but I am doing way better than I was last year about this time (last year this time I couldn't lift one 20 kg pellet sack (hardware stores sell wooden pellet used for heating and grocery stores sell the same wooden pellet as kitty litter... guess which one is WAY cheaper? *grin*) and nowadays I have no problems to lift them up while cleaning the litter box).
Admittedly my lungs sound worse under physical stress than they did last year this time, but I think it may be because my lungs are better now. (As odd as it sounds one of the symptoms of severe asthma can be that you can't wheeze because your airways are so obstructed.)

If I just have enough energy tomorrow I may actually be able to clean the place up. Then there's only left reorganizing the bedroom, washing windows and pile of carpets - maybe I can finally use my carpets now that Masa is castrated.

And... as I can't show you my happy dance piece I will leave you with a picture from last summer:

7 x 4

They say that life goes in cycles of seven years.

I realized that I am in the end of the fourth seven year cycle.
Maybe it is why I have been feeling lost, easily bored, found odd things from myself.

It's quite an interesting thing that seven years ago I moved to the other side of the country to study. I went there to study something I found interesting as much as I ran away from the situation Dan and I were in. It was my first attempt to leave him, or rather I wanted to see how my life would be without him. I wanted to see do I have a reason to come back to him.
I could have survived without him, but I came back for two reasons: I loved him and wanted to try for the second time and... I didn't want to live without physical intimacy. Maybe it makes me a moron.

Nowadays, few days before my third divorce anniversary... part of me doesn't want even think of being with someone, other part of me would love to be head over heels again, settle down and live in wedded bliss with kids... In its way it scares me, this all or nothing attitude I have found from myself. Or rather I have recently accepted it in me, as we know, I am a person with very passionate character and I am only contented with the highest high or the lowest low.

Though I am not sure would I like to change that in me, even it would probably make my life easier, at least it might make it easier to gain those few things I actually would love to have.

I have found myself from thinking men I once had in my life, but only those who I met after Dan, thinking of them with warmth, the good times we shared.
I don't miss them as such, but I miss the little things, the most I miss the feeling of warm skin against mine.
In theory that would be easy thing to achieve... Once just having that would have been enough, but not anymore.
With age I have collected a good deal of deal breakers and must-haves, aging has made me pickier and sometimes I worry have I got too picky, or is it just as they say: when you once have it good there's no going back.

Maybe I am, as I once thought, a love junkie. Maybe I suffer from emotional mania: only thing worth feeling is being high up in the clouds.

Our student advisor, when I was in ninth grade, said that I could be described as a person who has her feet firmly on the ground... and her head firmly up in the clouds. (I also surprised him in all the suitability tests he loved so as I was both artistic and mathematically gifted and my personality is suitable for both team work and working on my own. He decided that he can't suggest me any spesific career, but was sorely disappointed when I didn't apply for "high school", but applied to Crafts and Design School and got through the application exams well enough to be approved - there was some talk later about the basics why people were accepted and I recall hearing the words "great eye for colour".)
I think there should be one addition: my heart loves the sun up there, over the clouds, so it is either all sunshine and butterflies or nothing.

I am afraid that it makes me kind of an ass. It means that I have to be completely honest to myself, but it also means that I may change how things are in a second because even the smallest rain may drop me off of my cloud.

The interesting thing in this is that I find myself from thinking along the same lines as the other half of this shared, and in its way shattered, soul. The one I love dearly, the only person I seem to understand no matter what, but can't have because love isn't always fair. (Maybe that explains why he has been only one to be able to really knock me off of my feet to date.)
It doesn't mean that I am not over him, it just means that I have become to find life very odd thing - and in certain way I find it soothing to know that there is someone like me, spite of everything as I can't be a total ass if someone like mr. W. thinks like I do.

96 days until my 29th birthday, 96 days until the next seven years begin.

Yellow...

I had a distinctively yellow dream last night. We, who had either yellow shirts or weapons of sorts, fought against the mindless human drones, almost like zombies. They were after a guy who apparently was some sort of a hope of human kind - and only way to protect him from the drones was to clothe him in yellow clothes...
But still we had to fight the drones to save the world.

I remember vividly only one part of the dream, the part where I slashed the saw one of the drones used in half with my yellow one...

I googled and found this:

Yellow: Intellect

Meaning: Mental activity, intellect. Ability to rationalize.

If brought by healing agent it means the dreamer has difficulty rationalizing. Muddy or mustard yellow has the same meaning.
If guide wears or brings pure bright yellow, i.e. Yellow (intellect) plus White (Enlightenment) then dreamer as an intuitive or enlightened intellect.

Yellow may represent dreamer’s usual reaction to the subject matter.

It was bright yellow. And no one is surprised by this, I hope.

SBQ: Everything goes

This week's

Stitching Bloggers' Question

is:

When you stitch a pattern that you have downloaded do you print out the pattern or do you stitch directly from your computer screen?

Because main part of my stitching life I was printerless I have familiarized myself with stitching directly from the screen, and even though I now own a great multifunction printer with low printing costs (one sheet 3,1 cnt, assuming that I print it 600 dpi, which I never do with working copies) I still stitch from the screen.
Probably my luck is that I am a weaver and I had to learn to be able to keep track on the process without consulting the fabric image all the time and see the errors with jumping weft etc. at one glance and therefore I am able to easily track my progress from the chart without marking it.

Itsy bitsy teenie weenie over one happy dance

Of a complimentary design (for Mothers' Day) published soon. I just want to give it to my mother before I publish it so it won't be available before 5th of April or so.

One could say that it is somewhat art nouveau-ish, but that's all for now.

Notions

1. I paid way over 100 € for the best kitty toy ever: yet another cardboard box. The printing stuff in it was free of charge, of course.
2. My multifunction laser printer is so good that when I test drove the new ink cassette by taking a copy of a cross stitch chart the copy was of better quality than the original.
3. My CD burner still does not work properly - or I have bought a batch of very sucky CD-RWs.
4. Finnish post works sometimes: the printing stuff parcel was delivered to my door before 9 am.
5. I only seem to have normal circadian rhythm when my mind is continuously stimulated by intelligent, interesting conversations. *

 

And oh, just to remind: only the comments with email address in them at the pendibulle tutorial apply for the drawing.

---

* Dang, do I like chess players or do I like them? *grin* (I thoroughly enjoyed one game yesterday... I beat a guy whose rating was 400 points better than mine. The best bit: he had a very bad attitude towards me. And then the sucky lady got to beat him. *evil grin*
Fortunately there are male chess players who don't bitch - I have been playing few days with a man whose rating is 500-600 better than mine and we both enjoy the games (and chatting).)

Happy unbirthday to me!

I haven't checked my mailbox in few days (or rather over a week), but it was worth it...
I had already forgot that was one of the lucky ones who got on Barbara's unbirthday list a while ago and look what I received!

I can't keep my hands off of it, it's so darling! Thank you Barbara! ^^

And, to make one's day even better I had received some stashy mail from One Star's Light and Violarium:

The fabrics are from Violarium and the needleminder, floss and needles are from One Star's Light.

The Ultimate Kawaii Corp.

I am quite stupid sometimes

I have been wondering why I have been sleeping so oddly last days... it probably might help with my energy levels if I ate something in addition of two bowls of natural yoghurt with some honeydew melon bits in it/ day. Altogether they make whopping 800 kcal for a person whose average energy usage is about 2200 kcal/ day.
Can we say undernourishment?

I just can't seem to remember such mundane things. Eating, what's the idea with it anyway?

Still, I have spent some time to familiarize myself with few scripts and I have just started to re-do Periphaeria Designs' site (it's there, you just can't see it *evil grin*). When it is done it will be quite professional looking - and when it is done I can pat my back quite some time, maybe I have to even reward myself then with something... like new stash.

Pendibulle tutorial

You need these materials for a pendibulle:

• Square piece of fabric
• Embroidery floss
• Tapestry needle
• Polyfill, quilt batting or thread clippings
• ~20 cm (7.9'') of ribbon
• Design suitable for corners

I chose 28 count pewter Lugana, some unknown floss from my leftovers, white polyester ribbon and parts of Ring of Roses #1 for the corners.

1. Backstitch a square big enough for your corner motifs on your fabric (my square is 50 x 50 stitches). It is preferred that you use floss which shade is very close to your fabric's shade. I chose a bit darker for this square because it's more visible and therefore better for purpose of tutorial.

   

2. Stitch the motif to opposite corners.

   
   
   

3. Trim off the excess fabric. Leave ~8mm (1/3'') of seam allowance on each side.

   

4. Wash and iron the piece. Iron the the seam allowances to the backside to make the finishing process easier.

   

5. Fold the square so that it becomes a triangle. Note that the corners of the motifs are supposed to be facing each other on the tip of the triangle.

   

6. Take one ~1m (1.1 yards) strand of the floss you used for the backstitching, thread it and attach it securely to the back of the backstitches in the corner.

7. Take the ribbon and knot both its ends. Place the other end to the corner where you start (you can attach it with a pin if you feel like it).

   

8. Use whipped backstitch to sew the pieces together.

9. When you have closed about 75% of the edge, fill the pendibulle. Note that the "wings" shouldn't be filled.

   
   

10. Attach the other knotted end of the ribbon to the tip of the other "wing" and close the seam.

    
    
    

11. Don't end the floss yet, but use it to attach the tips of the wings to each other. You can do this by few small, well hidden stitches in the backstitches.

    

12. Now, you basically have a pendibulle and you can secure and finish your thread.

    

13. ... but I will add one more step and attach the tips of the wings to the body of the pendibulle with few well hidden stitches.

    

14. Then I decided to add a bow to hide the tips (which I had no need to do, it was neatly done, but I wanted to have some decoration).

    

15. Now, it is ready to be hung.

    It wasn't all that difficult, was it?

When I started making this piece I decided to give it away, so, if you wish to have this just leave a comment with your email address before 31st fo March, 2008, midnight and I will draw the winner in April Fools Day.

(Yes, those are chess boards. I was playing CC (as I have recently got badly addicted to it) when I was making this.)

Tutorial on the way

I am currently writing a tutorial (with pictures!) for the finishing I used for Terri's ornament and I anticipate that both the ornament and the tutorial will be finished today, so stay tuned.

Ornament has landed!

I just got a word (while I was trying to write a coherent blog entry about something completely different) from Terri that her ornament has arrived! (Her partner eventually sent the ornament, but I still wanted to cheer her up.)

Info:

• Design: Christmas 2007 complimentary design
• Designer: Christine Wilkins from Alchemy Stitchcraft
• Fabric: 32 count Victorian Red Jubilee(?)
• Floss: Misc. GASTs

I packed the ornament to same zip-lock bag with one of my biscornu designs, just to enable her a bit. *evil laughter*
The ornament came out beautifully and I like this finishing method as it is easy and effective. (I was actually thinking of how Ia! Ia! would look like finished like this when I was finishing Terri's ornament...)

It's beginning to look like something!

The artificial light doesn't show the shade difference between the reds nor the shading in the purples, but they are there.

A bit over half left to stitch.

Honestly speaking it looks thousand times better in real life, and I have to say that I am loving this "little" project already.

Brothers Furry

After 8½ years Neko and Seiichi have found a new night time activity: they sleep together. Guess which one is the big brother?

 
 

Yup, that would be Seiichi, the little black one. *grin*

Ewe's a happy dance!

Har har.

Regardless, a teaser of the Here's to Ewe exchange piece:

The picture is taken while I was still stitching the piece and I am not going to tell you is it the right side up or not...

It is stitched on 40 count Newcastle linen (which I dyed last summer) with GASTs, and the colours in the piece make it quite springlike. I am still pondering over the finishing, maybe a pillow or a modified mattress finishing... regardless what I decide I need more polyester filling.

Easter Dragon

Jennifer from Dragon Dreams has posted the cutest little Easter dragon to the News and it will only be up until midnight of March 24th so hurry!

The Spanish Sampler Mystery Stitch-A-Log started!

The Spanish Sampler Mystery Stitch-A-Long finally started. Spite of a dreadful case of stage fever I had the first part has been well received and the feedback has been amazing.

I have been stitching the first band today and I have to say that I am loving the design and the silks - VCs cover so well that I almost started with one strand instead of two, but decided that as I have charted and estimated the floss usage for two strands I should stitch it with two.
This is how the first band will look like:

And this is what I have now:

(Yes, it is upside down, but the picture looks better this way because of the angle I took it from.)

Unfortunately the picture doesn't show the subtle shade changes the purple has and which give a really positive boost to the whole band.
I guess I have about 35% done and I am quite sure this will be the first SAL I will be able to keep stitching within the given time limits.

Now I will stitch rest of the Here's to Ewe piece and get back to TSS after it. Stay tuned!

It's spring alright i.e. Codiaeum variegatum

When I bought the croton the clerk said it would be very difficult to care for over the winter ("It's quite a challenge to keep these beautiful foliage plants healthy outside of the tropics or a greenhouse") and would lose its redness due lack of light.

Crotty has been red whole winter and now... It's blooming - in addition of having grew up few additional leaves during winter (those deep green ones):

I don't have a green thumb, but my kitchen window seems to be good for tropical plants. (My jade plants enjoy it too.)

The Luck of the Irish, times three

"Wherever you go and whatever you do, May the luck of the Irish be there with you”

I haven't been at my best, but I have been stitching...

Tidbits:

• Design: Luck of the Irish - set of three biscornus.
• Designer: Lady Periphaeria of Periphaeria Designs.
• Fabric: 36 count flax Belfast linen.
• Fibers: VC silks and DMC/ Kreinik.
• Buttons: Vintage metal buttons from my mother's button box.

ETA: The set is available for purchase through PD (just click the image) or one of the retailers. *enabling grin*

15% off!

One Star's Light Needlework Supplies has 1st anniversary sale and you get 15% off when you give the coupon code 1YearAnniversary when checking out (of all orders from now until midnight Eastern Time on March 12th). Go and shop!

I meant to buy only some needles because the pack of 25 I bought from Jenna about a year ago is finally almost empty ($6 for a year worth of needles, not bad), but ended up buying two packs of Permin needles (26 and 28), Curious Cat needleminder and some Crescent Colours' cottons.

=^..^=

As a cat slave I find animals worth small deeds, like my daily click for free food for rescued animals at The Animal Rescue Site! (Thanks Angela for linking that a while ago!).
If you have as good as memory as mine they have a daily click email reminder...
It takes only five seconds a day, why not to do it? =^^=

Speaking of animals, I found this hilarious... because I have cats. If you have cats, you will understand.

SBQ: ?

This week's

Stitching Bloggers' Question

was originally posted on January 4, 2005 and is:

After you stitch a pattern or kit, what do you do with it?

Firstly: I love Renée's decision to recycle the old questions as I found SBQ only in 28th of September, 2005 and always have agonized over the fact.

I keep the pattern (usually) and rest of the floss. You don't know when you need them again - and left over floss is great for those small projects one always has.

While looking for my first SBQ ever I browsed through quite many entries from the time when Sol was in my life... damn, it seems that I was happy as long as it lasted. Sometimes it's good to remind oneself of such things.

This mountaintop is solitary, but cozy...

I love the random quote panel I installed on PD's community, I find great quotes from it all the time (though, over half of the quotes there are added by me - not to mention the amount of typos of the original quote list I had to fix before it was usable *rolls eyes until they fall off*):

"Clarity of mind means clarity of passion, too; this is why a great and clear mind loves ardently and sees distinctly what it loves."
--Blaise Pascal

In general I have spent last few days by thinking, wondering, pondering, thinking... and playing online chess - when I haven't slept like a mummy (I sleep 12 - 16 h/d, simply because I can't open my eyes and get up).

All the symptoms point to depression...

I am bored: [X] Yes, [ ] No
I have problems being generally interested of anything: [X] Yes, [ ] No *
I "lose hours" every day: [X] Yes, [ ] No **
I sleep too much: [X] Yes, [ ] No
I am socially withdrawn: [X] Yes, [ ] No

... the main point just is... that I am not.
My state of mind is completely normal, though more thoughtful than usually (i.e. I really process things).
One factor may be that due my odd rhythm I haven't took all of my daily cortisone inhalations which leads my asthma worsening which leads to tiredness and general exhaustion.

It may be that my body is simply exhausted and depressed due all the strain it has been under last years with all the health problems. Which leads to interesting situation: I am mentally healthy enough to work, but my physics probably couldn't take it in the long run. (This was sort of proved during those three months I worked in the $COMPANY: 1st month was fine, but I was on a sick leave continuously during 2nd and 3rd month, and after the period was over I was sick for two weeks (admittedly it was a mild influenza, but still - I rarely get those).)

If it is so, I may be in deep $*** as I am so dreadfully good at looking healthy (that was why the GP didn't diagnose the hyperventilation attack as one and sent me to hospital for the second opinion..) which practically means that I am never diagnosed as sick as I am.... damn, I'd say.

Anyway, I'm off to shower. All this concentrating on one thing hurts my brain.

---

*: I haven't read blogs in three days, and I check only the necessary email accounts (i.e. blogging email, PD's Gmail and TSS').
**: You know, that is actually a symptom of schizophrenia.

Chillin'

Yes, he is very much alive, rather relaxed though.

Incoming!

Better late than never, right? The biscornu, and the buttons, I received from Alexia:

And, I received belated Valentine's gift from Leena in Friday!

She stitched the ornament on a very familiar fabric... it's one of those 40 count linens I dyed last summer!

Thank you both!

Mad as a March hare... erm... goals

As usual strike and green equal a success. Orange is for "put some work to said piece, but not enough for a success", and red goes, as you guess, for a failure.

And the goals for February were:

1. Work on models: must finish two before 14th. Done! Finished three, and a half, models during February.
2. Participate Stitch-A-Thon. Done!
3. Start Here's to Ewe piece.
4. Stitch Flashes of Gold at least a bit.
5. Belated Christmas ornament for a friend at EMS board as her exchange partner apparently forgot the part of making and sending an ornament. Done!

Not too bad noticing that I had some health issues during the month of February. (It ended with an exploding migraine...)

The goals for March are:

1. Import at least two old designs (different software) to *.pat/ week.
2. Stitch at least two, and a half, models.
3. Stitch the accompanying piece to one of the latest designs, finish it and send the PIF to $COUNTRY.
4. Finish and send Terri's ornament.
5. Participate Stitch-A-Thon.
6. Stitch and finish Here's to Ewe piece.
7. Grid the Spanish Sampler's fabric before 15th and start TSS.
8. Organize my design tree (it's not a folder, it's a tree).
9. Decide the design for the biscornu exchange at FlossMoms.

Can we say lots of red in next month?

By the way, two new designs:

1. I designed a while ago a card for Violarium and it's now officially in use:
   
   
   
   I charted five different colour schemes: spring, summer, autumn, "rekipeitto" and winter. Second from the right is called rekipeitto because Leena named it like that (its colours remind her of old Finnish sleigh blankets).
   Rekipeitto is the original colour scheme.

   This design is loosely related to the Violarium Collection.

2. And I figured it would be fun to have general retailer complimentary design, dug my design stash and came out with Illusion (it has been sent to One Star's Light and Violarium):
   
   

There's no stitched model for either one, so I itch to stitch these some of these days.

And on less joyous Periphaeria Designs related note: Happy birthday PD aka. yup, I am famous now.