I don't know why, but I have had a flashback phase lately. In theory I have nothing to complain about, they are flashbacks of happy moments, but I'm not sure do I want to have them because those moments are from past relationships... things I had already forgot (yet things that made me happy, and which in a way make me happy even now).
Interesting thing is that none of the flashs is older than three years. It's soon three years from the day when Dan, finally, moved out and a bit less from the day when I got hooked up with Abhi.

I have also had some odd dreams, which, thinking of it now, probably share the origin with flashs.
Firstly the basic pattern of the dreams, then an explanation... I go back to school, the teacher is some of my past teachers (so I assume that the idea is behind the teacher, not the person). The thing is that in every dream of this brand I have been out of school since last August/ September and the teacher always nag why I haven't been at school and how you are not allowed to do so without an extremely good reason. My answer is always the same: you didn't seem to miss me though, you might have wanted to contact me or someone close to me...

My conclusion is that either the school of hard hits wants me back or I want back in it. I have been out of the relationship game since last summer, firstly because losing Wolfie hurted - badly (he's still a sore spot), and secondly, because I met N. who kind of freed me from looking for a relationship as he provided most things you ger from a romantic relationship - excluding the romance part...
Anyway, the school of life, timeline of my disappearance, flashbacks... someone wants to go back to school, someone wants to find someone wonderful, right? (Admittedly my family nerve has been tickling lately, so if I just blame my loudly ticking biological clock and forget the facts?)

But I also acknowledge the facts: at this moment I couldn't concentrate on a relationship (who am I fooling? I could, I would just prioritize) because all the energy I have goes on breathing... literally.