I knew it!

I saw the endocrinologist today.

It was such a stressing experience, I couldn't sleep well the night before and was very anxious whole morning...

...but the main thing is that the doctor thought that it is much more useful to test what thyroxine does to me than spend, like the other doctors, years arguing about the diagnostics of hypothyroidism.

And even though my values are still within the allowed limits my symptoms, family history and swollen thyroid (can we say goiter?) are enough to justify prescribing the medication.

So, Houston... we have thyroxine!

We agreed to meet again around September and see how the medication has affected to my health - and if it has affected positively The Doc will up the dosage, as in his opinion 0,1 mg is not enough in my case, and apparently give me the official hypothyroidism diagnose.

No matter how it makes me sound I am HAPPY!
It took over two years, but finally a doctor listened to me and examined me and admitted that I have probably been right all along.

This is why some people are called specialists.

Writer's Block: Bitter aftertaste

 

Basically I have never gave a damn when it came to roommate's or friend's musical preferences - though admittedly I do not think too highly of a person who listens solely of one artist or genre. Being a person with very varying musical taste I find it disturbing that there is someone who can be so limited, strict or just plain boring.

When it comes to love music has played a big part and it has usually been unifying factor (excluding Dan's love for Mozart, whereas I can not stand most of Mozart as it shuts my brain): without my love for music I had never ever met or got to know Sonnenschein or Wolfie (in Wolfie's case this is more than true).

Though we have never discussed much about music with Mr. Wonderful we seem to share at least some preferences (soul, jazz etc.) and the differences we have haven't been an issue.

I have also found several music styles I love because of love. Had I ever learned about Indian, Brazilian, Thai or Nigerian modern music without the persons who matter the most, I can not say, just assume that I hadn't.

But detract? I would love to say that am too stubborn to that, but I have to say that in a way it happened back in past as I want to please the person I love too much and thought that suppressing my own personality to support the one I loved was a good idea. Well, it wasn't and I learned my lesson: music is a big part of who I am and one should be able to enjoy the music one loves.

It's quiet...

... here in my little blog, or so it seems. Though nothing much happens in my life, or maybe I am just too busy/ bored not to blog. I don't know.

Regardless, stashy pictures!

These two cane like this and I am simply loving the combo (the scanner does not repeat the awesomeness) and therefore must use these two together in some project.

As you may have guessed I had a minor shopping spree at 1-2-3 Stitch!'s Clearance section and then got some luscious Caron silk to, ahem, justify the postages.

I have been stitching

And I have actually finished little something, but I have been way too tired (been busy at work, Mr. Wonderful is traveling (yes, again *grin*), hence I am not sleepin too well, and I haven't been well (again)) to update PD's website.

Damn, if I was right

Remember how I suspected back in 2008 that I suffer from hypothyroidism? And how it was diagnosed as depression? And how the medication helped?

Well, I suspect again that I was right as my symptoms continue and I have found out more about the condition...

1. It's hereditary and likelihood of having it increases with, for eample following: diabetes mellitus type II and hypothyroidism.

   Approximately every Finn has DM II in their family, and my mom has been diagnosed with hypothyroidism last year.

2. Setralin, the medication I was given:
   • lowers TSH levels (i.e. fools the tests) and

   • can cause hypothyroidism.

3. My symptom list is now 21 symptoms long, and consist of well known symptoms of hypothyroidism.

4. Cortisone lowers TSH levels. And who takes it daily? Yes, that would be me.

5. My TSH levels were checked last Christmas: 3,7 when the "legal limit" is 4.

   And you can suffer from hypothyroidism with completly normal TSH levels.

   Fun, isn't it?

Not to mention our little experiment after Christmas: my mom gave me two weeks worth of .025 mg synthetic thyroid hormone... Not long and not much, but my toe nails begun to grow again, after appr. 17 years of growing so and so - and I just felt more alive.

Today I made an appointment with an endocrinologist who is specialised on thyroid diagnoses without blindly trusting the lab tests (back in old days, before '70s or so, there were no tests for thyroid conditions and diagnoses were made solely based on symptoms - nowadays doctors mostly seems to hide behind lab tests and "normal" values (even everyone in their right mind should know that there are people who have abnormal levels of whatever)) and I am seeing him in June.

But enouh compkaining. I will make some more coffee and stitch for a while before heading to work for the evening.

Alive and well

They say you should never compare people so I won't, but let's just say that this life has taught me many things and one of them is value of a man who calls you when he is late and tells you why he is late even when you are not asking.

Those tiny things, those tiny things which say "I love you" louder than anything else.

I may have said it before, but I say it anyway: it was really worth every second to be single so long before Mr. Wonderful found me. And soon we have been together as long as I was waiting for Him.

So...

Everything is well, I am not, but that is normal anyway. *grin*

I have even been stitching lately, not much or quickly, but I am loving every minute spent stitching over one on 36 count linen. I have missed that. Maybe I even give you some stitchy content some day again. o.O

So, I am off to stitch again! Have to keep my mojo going now that I have found it again!

Writer's Block: Turn and face the strain

First of all I wish to thank everyone for the well wishes upon our marriage. ^^

 

Suitable meme for this period of my life...

I would say that the biggest was absolutely getting married with Mr. Wonderful and I would say it is nothing but a HUGELY positive thing. ^^

Writer's Block: Take me as I am

Maybe I am not the best person to answer this as I have encountered such a situation in my life, but on the other hand I am because I can say things based on experience.

Dan, my ex-husband (for those of you who don't know), confessed many things after we got married and one of them was that he had been sentenced for committing a serious crime in his past. It was his luck that he was young and that in here certain types of crimes are not punished as strictly as they should as he got out of it with parole.

I was surprised and shocked because I couldn't understand why he never told me about that as he had had his issues with law and order in his youth and he had told me about that stuff before our marriage.
Shortly put I was angry at him because he didn't trust me more earlier.

When it comes to the crime I never believed, nor believe it now, that he was actually guilty. I have seen the court documents which in my opinion do not prove that he had committed said crime. And I can say that I know enough about him to not believe that he could do that kind of thing.

Basically when it comes to things like that I take them surprisingly easily. What ever my partner has done in their past has been in their past and it can't be changed. People can, however, change and what really matters is who my partner is now.

So, I can say that it did not affect to our relationship in any way, it was other stuff that eventually killed our marriage.

Let Me Introduce You... Mrs. Wonderful!

Some of you already know it through Facebook, those of you who didn't know: Yes, you read it right! We are now officially Mr. and Mrs. Wonderful. ^^

It was a very small, but beautiful, ceremony last Friday, just the two of us, the registrar and two witnesses from the magistrate.

To the shock and awe of everyone who know me I took Husband's surname after my vows of *never* taking my husband's name... but my brain told differently.
We had discussed my surname when we got engaged and I was SO keeping my maiden name, until I noticed at work that I was continuously about >this< close to sign things with Husband's surname... and then, one day after coming home from work I told Him that it seems that I am taking His surname anyway (and it is much more convenient if we look at the bigger picture (and much more rare in here than my maiden name *grin*)).

This also leads to shocking revelation of us having been engaged to be married since 29th of March last year until last Friday, and I didn't tell you (ok, some of you did kind of knew)! Shame on me. *grin*

It's funny how I remember almost nothing about the ceremony itself, but am still aware that when the registrar asked Husband will He take me as His wedded wife He said most beautiful things ever - simple yes would have been extremely beautiful in that situation, but He took it further. I was all smiling yello, wobbling and smiling, and my answer was simply "Absolutely yes!".

Gosh, it was SO wonderful.

And for some reason it seems to me that getting married really improved our relationship in so many ways. Funny, but great - apparently there is better form of great and we just have gotten into it. Which I do not oppose at all, just keep wondering how sweet life can be sometimes.

Writer's Block: Another sleepless night

Let's say that I used to suffer from insomnia as I do no count one or two days of not being able to sleep well/ long enough as insomnia anymore.

I have always had somewhat odd sleeping rhythm, which probably runs in the family, and it took me years before I actually realised that it is not normal, or let's say preferred.

For me sleeping medication does not work how it should work so it has not been an option since the first and only time I tried such remedy: within two weeks I couldn't sleep even with the next-to-overdose dosage which made my insomnia even worse. After some time I decided to go cold turkey (even the doctor who prescribed me with them said they do not cause any side effects or any addiction - like I believed anyone?) and practically stayed awake for one week with only very short nap (we are talking anything up to 45 minutes or so here) every night before the medicine left the building.

I have "suffered" insomnia even after that, it happens to me for reason or tenth: latest periods of insomnia were when Mr. Wonderful was in Spain. Since then I have had two nights when I had difficulties to fall asleep, but those were caused by hurting ankle (I was told yesterday that it takes six weeks for it to heal properly) and overdose of paracetamol (1500mg/day whereas you are allowed to take 3000mg/day, but my body is little different..).

I don't know are they much of remedies, but what has helped me to get sleep have been the following things:

1. Black Adder, seasons I-IV
2. Rooibos
3. Yes, Minister; seasons I-III
4. Yes, Prime Minister; seasons I-II
5. The Men from the Ministry, Finnish version
6. Music

Honestly.

To certain extent insomnia is a matter of attitude and habit, in other words I have noticed it gets easier to live with the older I get. I can go to work without sleeping at all during the night and nobody notices (it's good to be naturally confused ).
The main thing with insomnia is not to stress too much about it, no matter how harsh it sounds.

Writer's Block: Kids or child-free?

1. First of all I, being blue meanie and everything, find the term "choose to have children" disturbing as whether you have children or not in the end is basically something you can not choose (as you never know are you physically able to have them even if you want them, right? Nor you can prevent yourself getting pregnant/ making someone pregnant by "accident" as that does happen - it also happens that people don't notice things early etc., you get my point).
   Personally I see children as an extremely precious gift and I wish and pray to have them.

   I realized that I would do anything to have children when I was 18 and got PCOS diagnose and the doctor basically told me that PCOS women can't get pregnant naturally, or any other way (neither of them true) - before that I had never even thought about having or not having children (like I never actually thought of getting married before I was proposed when I was 19 - my ex and I were engaged, but I never thought that I would marry him some day. I guess you could say now that it tells more than I would like to admit about my subconscious mind back then *grin*).

2. Honestly... IF you are in a relationship you do NOT decide something like that yourself. Basically such thing should, in an adult relationship, be decided as early in the relationship as possible by both parties.

   When it comes to us it was obvious for both of us from the beginning of things that we want to have children and this was therefore decided before we even got into a relationship.

Writer's Block: Raining cats or dogs?

My regular readers know it already, but I would say that I am 99,9% cat person and 0,01% dog person.

I have met some nice (and non-smelly) dogs during my life, I was especially fond of ex-husband's sister's dog: he was kind, he did not smell like so many dogs do (sorry dog people, but they do) and he was a dog-sized dog (not too small, not too big).

Dan and I watched after The Dog at one point for a week and I really enjoyed it. Though, it was rather I who watched after The Dog, took him to his walks and everything. At that point I was doing night shifts and even I was extremely annoyed with Dan not waking up in the morning (it was 9 am when I got home and he was sound asleep... even when I tried to wake him up to take The Dog out and let me sleep (note that he was not working (actually he hasn't actually worked a day in his life even now, as far as I know))) and taking The Dog out I enjoyed immensely those long morning walks with it.

But, still I am a cat person, which probably explains why I had four of them not-so-long-ago.
Why? Cats are usually very neat, relaxed and don't demand long walks three times a day even if there is the worst snow storm out there. They are also annoyingly sweet with their bouts of jumping on walls and wanting to be petted at that very moment when you have something important to do.
Cats are loyal thinkers, who don't demand too much of you (usually - and Her Highness was Siamese so she does not count) and love you in their own personal, yet devoted ways.

Life is never boring with cats in the house.

I am not a roommate type anyway so I wouldn't consider someone who doesn't like cats as a roommate. Basically my fondness of being on my own if I am not in a relationship has kept me from that problem.

When it comes to partner... Well, I admit that cats moved away when Mr. Wonderful moved here even I had swore to myself that no man comes between me and my cats... Well, basically He didn't, boys still seems to like me:

(
This was taken when I was tending the boys when my mom was at her cabin in the end of February - admittedly it was bit difficult to tend the cats properly with sprained ankle)

I wouldn't say that He doesn't like cats, He is just not used to have animals living in the house. This is, I would say, the biggest cultural difference, to this date, we have actually confronted.

Are any of you surprised when I tell that I haven't been able to sleep too well?

Good, neither am I.

Are any of you surprised that because of this I also managed to break the frame of my glasses? Yes, ouch. (Admittedly they are old: 7-8 years for all-plastic frame is quite well, I would say.)
Luckily we have super glue: it doesn't look pretty, but I am able to see before our visit to Helsinki and maybe even during the time when I am waiting for new glasses (thank G-d for el cheapo optician chains, with luck new ones are only 29€).

My mom could have said this!

"When you meet someone who can cook and do housework don't hesitate a minute: marry him!"
-- Unknown

(And I am lucky to have such a gem in my life. ^^)

Talking of housework, this ankle thing has given a completely new meaning to word accomplish: plain hoovering most of the apartment and wiping living room floor feels like a huge achievement.
And The Ankle Thing also gives a great reason to sprawl on the sofa for ages after doing something: must not strain my poor ankle too much.

Too bad I got addicted to Harry Potter books again so I have been reading the series through instead of stitching...

\o/

His plane lands on Saturday 6 am.

I just hope and pray that the current strike affecting transportation and logistics doesn't affect airports too badly...

(strangeglitter , your comment was deleted by mistake - who would have imagined that you can delete the actual comment from your inbox when trying to just remove the notification message from the inbox? O.o)

 

Writer's Block: Marital license

 

Marrige licence does indeed have an expiration date, at least in my neck of woods (4 months), whereas marriage certificate doesn't. (I am aware that this is a tomato vs. tomato thing, but still... you know that I am pedantic when I feel like it.)

Taking that we are really talking of marriage certificate, that piece of paper you are given when getting married (opposed to the licence which, at least in here, is written after non-impediment check and (in non-dominational weddings) given to the registrar (or to the couple to be given to the registrar upon marrying) - without that piece of paper you are not able to marry) my personal opinion is: absolutely not.

Despite being divorced I do firmly believe that you get married for a lifetime and if my fiance would ever suggest periodic marriage contract I would frown and run away fast. (Though this is completely theoretic as we share views about marriage.)

It is possible that that kind of contracts are suitable or at least acceptable to some people I find even thought of such a setting too stressful for my person and degrading the institution of marriage.
As I see it periodic marriage contract is basically saying that divorce is always an option and that it is likely for the marriage to end. Why work for something you can end within X months anyway? What if you are just having a bad phase in your relationship when the renewal date is and you decide not to renew your marriage even it had all the makings for a happy, lifelong committment?

Marriage does take much more than just love and in my opinion periodic marriage would just base on the idea of love and nothing else. And the difficult thing here is that love fluctuates: there are days when you really don't have that loving feeling, but after a while you can be like two newlyweds. Love is a form of energy and sometimes its batteries needs to be recharged.

I could also say that I do not believe in divorce... I am not holier than thou, I have divorced and I have never been ashamed of that (even many people still find it odd that I am "this young" and already divorced - guess how it was when I was still 25 and recent divorcee *grin*), but when I got married (at the age of 19) I was in for if for a lifetime, but being young and stupid marrying another young and stupid who was unwilling to grow up and lacked consistency there eventually was no other option for me then. It was either that or dying young out of stress. And I wanted to give my possible children a good father, not one of those I had.

So, in case it wasn't clear: I do not think that there should be expiration or renewal date in your marriage certificate.

 

Writer's Block: My word

Stephen King!

'Nuff said.

Writer's Block: Ten years to the day

 

Let's say that I don't expect anything, but I hope, wish and pray that we, Mr. Wonderful and myself, are happily married, have been blessed with children, He has a good job (or rather His own business as that is what He really wants) and live normal family life in where ever we live.

 

This is actually in some terms very current topic as we found out yesterday that my local magistrate has given us wrong information last year regarding those infamous documents.
We found it out as He called me and said He has the documents (at this point I was deliriously happy that He is finally coming home), asked me to call there and double check with the magistrate... and we found out that some incompetent dimwit hasn't told everything to us and the person I spoke yesterday thought that it is completely our fault, because we should apparently know things better than they do. (You simply can't ask the right questions if someone, a professional, does not ask those questions from you first and let you know how all eventualities affect to everything.)

And I should therefore make some phone calls today - and being the mean bitch I am I will also call another magistrate in the vicinity and ask about the same topic from them as I am not too confident about the local one giving any correct information any more... I wonder why.

ETA: I am not very surprised, though very relieved. I called the Other Magistrate (too much Harry Potter, yes) and they said that the first info we got from local magistrate was accurate, so no need for tons of other papers.

I could almost have the courage to say that He is returning home soon if I wasn't too afraid of "painting devils on walls". G-d willing He will be back soon.

2 days stitched, 19 to go

... thanks to this.

On Saturday evening I slipped on icy ground on my way from work, heard something snap in my left leg and was in tremendous pain. My co-worker called an ambulance (my first ambulance ride \o/) and I was rushed to a surgical ER close by. Preliminary diagnoses were broken ("ripped") achilles tendon or leg bone.

Hour later I was out of the hospital, with a sprained ankle, crutches, prescription for pain killers and three weeks of stitching time sick leave (paid, of course) - thank G-d I have strong bones and tendons.
The funny thing is that even it happened less than two days ago I don't need almost any pain killers and I can actually put weight on my ankle normally as long as I keep my ankle stiff and don't put the weight on my heel - otherwise all movement and weight on my ankle hurts (the injury is close to my achilles tendon based on the pain).
My old me would say something about sounding incoherent, but I know that Mr. Wonderful has been praying a lot because of my injury and I am quite prone to believe He has good relations to upstairs because the way my ankle has started healing is... not of this world.

I have once had sprained ankle before and it took several days before I was able to put weight on it and stop the pain killers (compared to today's, second day of my sick leave, "huge" dose of paracetamol: 500 mg i.e. one tablet, back then it was several times 600 mg ibuprofen). That was 20 years ago, so you could imagine that 10 year old would have started recover quicker than 30 year old... and I can tell this was worse injury than the one I had as a kid.

And anyway, anything that reduces the pain and helps rehabilitiation is good, whether it was incoherent or not. And this is good time for awkward transition to...

Madonna!

No, not *that* Madonna, but the one in the garden.

Stitching has also proved to be a great pain killer and even though I have been tediously slow (even the basic daily things take surprising amount of time with just one working leg as you have to change the way you do everything, which reduces stitching time) and had to frog over half a fruit because I had chosen wrong shade for it yesterday (I was drowsy because of the pain shock, pain killers and sleeping poorly) there is some progress! (Shocking.)

To make it fun I lack few of the colours, and most of them seem to be used on the ground and fruits (and the dress and her petticoat). Luckily 1-2-3 Stitch! does sell DMC to EU area with their regular price so my missing flosses are on their way. Yay!

There has also been one cat related accident when Masa spilled tea over the fabric... Luckily it doesn't seem to have stained the fabric as I ran to the toilet with it (ok, "ran") as soon as I could and I rinsed it.

Mirabilia's "Madonna of the Garden": mixed race child

I admit, I started the design yesterday! I am weak!

Anyway, my plan is to make the child mixed race and as I am avoiding household chores I decided to check my intended colour scheme with my designing software... Somehow it didn't work for me - the scheme, software worked well - so I tried with another one... and I do like it, though I have to check it with the floss one of these days. (Though the software has quite good DMC colour compability.)

© Mirabilia

What do you think?

I hate to say it, but I actually like mixed race baby MUCH more. (Admittedly I also tweaked the mouth a bit, the baby looked so unhappy with the original.)

I hear dishes calling me... wish me luck.

Medication through mail

It is too bad you are not sitting here on the sofa with me. If you were you could smell the divine smell of Echinacea Mixed Herbal Tea I am drinking and fondle the beauty of a Silkweaver Lugana.

But you are not here and it is all mine, MINE! *insane giggling*

Quite some time ago kill_the_onions sent me some "fun mail" inspired by our little conversation in the comment section of one of my FB status updates, and finally, after taking scenic route from Turkey to Finland the fun has arrived!

Teas are Turkish, but the card is from China, but beautiful nevertheless.

kill_the_onions is a tea afecionado, and I am becoming one, again (after few years of not being able to drink tea at all - it's odd how Mr. Wonderful affects my body) so what is better than be able to taste some tea from country far away? (It is even better because I have never been to Turkey.)

But lo and behold, there was more great mail waiting for me... Belinda asked some time ago at FB would someone like to have Mirabilia's "Madonna of the Garden" and I was first one to say yes!

I had been over the Moon just to have the design itself, but Belinda added her leftover beads, metallics and delicas and piece of 19'' x 26'' 32 count hand-dyed Lugana from Silkweaver!

Now I just need to win the lottery and quit working... well, I have great reason to start this design soon, right? I have beads, design and fabric... I just can't let them gather dust, right?
Actually my fingers itch to stitch it already, but it is half past five in the morning and I haven't slept in last... 18 hours - which is quite a lot when you have laryngitis and bronchitis and you should be resting (though it's difficult to sleep when you are coughing sticky mucus...).

(Though I have been surprisingly productive stitching wise while sick: I have very small projects I have been working on when I have felt like it.)

Once upon a time, approximately 47433600 seconds ago...

18 months ago I heard that soft, sensual voice and saw His Gorgeousness first time in person and couldn't believe that He really was here, that He really was here for little old me and meant business with everything He had said to me in His emails, texts and calls.

18 months ago we sat in the back seat of a taxi holding hands and smiling to each other, just because we were finally together.

Somehow it doesn't feel like 18 months. It feels like we had known much longer and it feels like it was last week. But the main thing, and what is most important, is that this feels good.

No, not just that... We, us, our relationship, feels better and better day by day.
(Of course no relationship is perfect because it consists of two imperfect persons, but I want to grow old and cranky with Him and tell stories to our grandkids about how it was back then when grandpa moved to Finland.)

And every day I try to remember to stop and thank G-d for listening my prayers and bringing this wonderful Man into my life. And every now and then I tell my Wonderful how blessed I am to be loved by Him.

Sometimes it really hits me how tremendously blessed I am and wonder what good I did to meet Mr. Wonderful. Whatever it was, I am deliriously happy for it.

Out of these 18 months we have been separated by a continent, or two, for over 12 months and still I haven't felt lonely for one second. I miss Him every second He is not here, but I am not alone, no matter where He is, as He is in my heart.
Admittedly I see Him everywhere, in little things, facial features of people, verbal expressions they use... all those little things remind me of Him, even they have nothing to do with Him - they just are similar, but still incomparable with His ways.

Some of you may wonder why I adress my Wonderful always with capital letter... I do it because I respect Him. There are men and then there is The Man, my Man. That capital letter defines Him and His importance to me.

I love Him. He loves me. He still calls me Angel. ^^

All is well in the world.

Writer's Block: Online relationship shopping

Ok, this is an old WB, so what?

 

 

Oh, this is just the question for me: within last 12 years I have met all my partners, and men I have had crush for, online (that makes one ex-husband (Dan), one FWB (N.), three significant (let's say Men I could have considered marrying (I actually proposed Sol back in 2005 - yes, I did. )) others (Abhi, Sol and Wolfie) and my dear common-law husband, Mr. Wonderful).

Unfortunately I can't say how it has changed the way people in general meet and form relationships, I can only tell my own experiences.

First of all it is much easier for me to talk to strangers online: I am dreadful at small talk with strangers and I actually don't like it much, even I am slowly getting better at chit-chat. It is also much easier to talk about serious issues because you get time to think what you say and how you react to what other person says to you - and I rather type than talk because I am much more eloquent in typing (and I tend to stutter occasionally when I talk).

All this typing talk also makes it possible to get to know people without knowing how they look like which enables better view of the person as whole when you see how they look.
I am also quite modest about my looks due my background (once an ugly ducking, always an ugly duckling - at least in some level) and the general beauty aspect in West, even I have been constantly told how stunning I am last years, and I rather let people know who I am, not how I look like.
Well, "of course" I use wrong tense here. Many things have changed as nowadays I really don't even want complete strangers to know how I look like or what I think of - excluding Facebook. *grin*

I would say that in certain level meeting online probably lessens the importance of looks, but being honest looks have been imporant issue for me for few years: looks tell something about person's health and lifestyle, and eyes are the mirror of the soul.

I remember when I got the first message, at that infamous dating site, from Mr. Wonderful: first thing I did, after reading His message, was to check His pictures and after that His written profile. (Truth to be told is that if I had read His profile without reading His message or seeing His gorgeousness I would probably have left His message unanswered - and life would be much different from what it is now.)
He was a good-looking man (He has since evolved to be Amazingly Gorgeous (with capital letters, yes)) and His message just made me write back - and here we are going strong, 18 ½ months after that day.

So, looks did matter, but wasn't the only thing. One of the major factors was that He was employed: I admit being nasty that way, but after Dan I simply couldn't consider man who doesn't have a job, as in my opinion man has to be The Man, not just a man, and be able to take care of his family. (Mr. Wonderful thinks the same and it pains Him not to be able to finance our little family at the moment (as He lost His job last year - which has had also positive effect in our lives though).)

In general man's financial status has never had much impact in my heart's ways: but oddly enough in post-Dan life the men in my life have been, how would I say it, financially well-to-do.

So, it is not one thing, or two things. Or one or two things which you don't agree upon. It is the bigger picture.
I found Man with intellect, good looks, strong values (even I don't agree with all of them I respect them), desire for getting married and having children, treating His Lady like the Queen and will to succeed in life. And the most amazing smile.

The thing is: eventually you are the only one who defines how finding someone works for you and what traits you emphasize in others, whether you do it on- or offline. You just need to know what you really want.